Is it possible to fall in love with a pair of shoes?

Um, that's what I'd call a rhetorical question. Of course it's possible! In fact, I've had this feeling about many, many pairs. It may be wrong, but I don't have a monogamous relationship with my shoes. I am living in shoe sin and I am not ashamed. I've had many shoes in my past, and present, and I'm sure I'll have many more in the future. However, I don't consider myself a shoe whore. Because unlike a, well, whore is such an unpleasant word. I think vamp is more appropriate, don't you? Anyway, would a shoe vamp (har), have real feelings for her shoes? No! She'd just use and abuse them, right? I mean, that's what vamps do. Not me. I love them. Love love love them.

I have different categories of shoe love. There's the obvious, these-shoes-are-so- hot kind of love, which is more passionate in nature. Yes, I can put them on while alone in my house and just gaze lovingly at them. When I wear them out and about, they are like my trophy-man. I notice people look at them, and when I catch them staring, I smile smugly, as if to say, "Yes, these are coming home with me tonight!"

Then there's my happy shoes. Happy shoes are cute and comfortable. When I look at them, I think, "How could something this cute be so comfortable?" It is possible to have the best of both worlds. These are the shoes I would take home to meet my mother. And my mother would actually approve! Sigh. I'm such a lucky gal.

Then there's the great deal shoes, which always make my day because I can't believe that these shoes, which are so so so cool, cost less than the pedicure I just got, which by the way, shows off my incredible shoes even more so! It's kind of the pat-myself-on-the-back type of shoe. Yay me! I am so smart and practical, which no one else would guess by looking at my shoes, because they look like I spent a fortune! But no, I saved so much money, I can go buy some more shoes, if I want. Or I can just savor the moment, everytime I happen to glance at them, or get compliments on them, which is quite often.

I do have to admit, though, that there have been times I've selected shoes for the wrong reasons. I've bought some knowing full well that the shoes and I just weren't right for one another. Just not a good fit. Oh sure, in the beginning, I was thinking, I can make it work. But that kind of unrealistic expectation just leads to pain and suffering. And the best thing to do is to just let them go. I don't care how gosh-darn good looking they are or how they gave me goose-bumps when we first met. I gotta break it off. No hard feelings -- if they give someone else joy, then that's a good thing, and if they give someone else pain, well, then they are just cruel shoes and if they don't change their ways, they are going to find themselves in the dumpster one day with yesterday's news. Either way, they aren't MY problem anymore.

I could go on and on about the little shoe harem I have at home. I could count the ways in which I love them. But I think I've made my point. So the next time anyone gives you, my fellow shoe lover, grief about your shoes, or complains about the stilettos in your closet, just remember, there's nothing you need to apologize for. Just remember -- "Love means never having to say your sorry."